Holiday Traditions

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Even though it's only September I can't help but be excited for the upcoming holidays, especially because this year we're doing something a little different.

These last two years have been a little sticky when it comes to family holidays.  My family has always gone to Illinois for Thanksgiving and Christmas because it's where my dad's sisters and mother lives and we always celebrate with them.  Dustin's dad, step mom and sister live here in Wisconsin.  So when we got married we knew we'd have to juggle holidays.  We decided the best thing to do would be to go with one family for Thanksgiving, one family for Christmas and then switch the next year.  This worked okay but I know I found myself missing my own family traditions A LOT.

For those of you that haven't ventured over to my other blog After 'I Do', my parents just bought a house in the town that Dustin and I live in.  They bought the house so that Dustin and I could rent part of it from them for CHEAP and so that they'd have a place to stay.  They're planning on moving from Wisconsin to Florida soon but they want a home to stay when they come back to the Midwest to visit for holidays and what not.  We're all moved in now and we just came to the realization that this could be a place to make new holiday memories.

So rather than schlepp to Illinois this year for Thanksgiving and half an hour away to Star Prairie, WI for Christmas we decided we'd like to have my parents, my brother and in-laws over here for a joint Thanksgiving.  Although I'll miss seeing my aunts and grandma I have to say I am incredibly excited to have both sides of our family brought together.

When you get married there are certain things you have to compromise on and for us one of the biggest compromises we made was the holidays.  Although we're finding that we can't keep all of our old traditions, it's fun to make new memories and establish new traditions that hopefully we'll celebrate for years to come.

So not Martha....

Before I got married I wanted to be prepared.  I read elevendy billion marriage books, we did pre-marital counseling and I asked anyone and everyone I could think of just what marriage was like.

After we got married I realized that no matter how much you prepare you really won't know what marriage is like until you're in it.  

Craig and I dated for six years so I figured we wouldn't experience many surprises....but I was wrong.  I'm still learning new things about him daily.  

BUT....while I think that marriage is a "learn as you go" kind of thing, I wanted to share one thing that I (REALLY) wish someone would've told me before I got married.

You don't have to be perfect.  

You are NOT freaking Martha Stewart

and you don't have to be!

I had all these notions about what a wife is "supposed" to do and how she's supposed to act.  Craig and I had never lived together, so it was kind of like playing house at first.  I had no idea how to cook.  I know a lot of people say that, but I had literally burned water prior to saying my "I Do's".  BUT...for some crazy reason I thought that as soon as Craig carried me across the threshold of our new home I was supposed to instantly be Suzy Homemaker:  cooking (in an apron, heels and pearls no less!), cleaning, and organizing our busy social life. 

I decided (in what must have been a moment of pure insanity) that I was going to make a different meal every night.  This lasted for the first 3 months until I finally thought I was going to go homicidal on someone if I had to sauté another clove of garlic.  

I was literally coming home from work at 4:00 every day and I'd start cooking dinner, which usually took 2-3 hours (due to my inexperience) and after that I'd do dishes and clean any other parts of the house that had been neglected.  Our house was so clean you could literally eat off the floors and toilets.  Sounds great, but I was miserable and it made me into a total beyotch.  

I became really resentful toward Craig about all the "tasks" I had to do while he was sitting around relaxing.  Eventually Craig told me that I needed to chill the heck out and that he'd rather have a sink full of dishes and a happy wife to sit and watch TV with him.  

At first this was difficult because of my OCD tendencies, but now our house is much messier, but I am much happier.

Moral of the story:

You don't have to be the perfect housewife.

Your husband will love you anyway.

Did you learn any tough lessons when you first got married?

xo

{Lauren}

Fighting Fair

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I will admit this. I am not a nice fighter. I'm not sure WHY. But I have a bad temper and when it's set off I EXPLODE. We're talking screaming, saying nasty things, being an all out bitch. It's not a pretty sight and I am the first to admit that it's probably not all that healthy either.

Any guy I've ever been with has probably had a good taste of my temper but my husband probably has had it the worst because he's been with me nearly 5 years (and counting). We have had some BAD fights. When my temper goes off I bring out the worst in Dustin. And so things just go from bad to worse.

One of my 101 in 1001 is to start fighting fair. The thing is, I have no idea how to do this! I always start off wanting to be calm and collected, to lay my cards on the table, do this "I feel ______ when you do/say _____." However, the minute my emotions get heightened I find myself losing all control! And before I know it I'm locked in the bedroom sobbing hysterically and probably making my neighbors wish they had a shotgun to put me (and them) out of my misery.

So my questions to those of you that DO fight fair is this:

• How do you do it?
• How do you keep your temper under control and have a fair, clean fight?
• What can I do to keep myself from screaming, stomping my feet and throwing a temper tantrum?

Because seriously, I need a new "plan of attack."

A Grateful Wife.

My name is Meghan, and I am the resident slacker wife.

(Hi, Meghan...)

In all seriousness, hello to all of our new readers and thanks for stopping by. It's been awhile since I've visited TWD, and there's a reason for that...

I am a mess. Between the end of the school year (I am a teacher), the mountains of papers to grade, internet troubles, planning several vacations and realizing that I am turning 30 next week - well, things have been a little hectic. And while this might be a little cheesy, I'd like to use this forum to thank my hubby for the fact that he hasn't committed me to the loony bin...yet. I think it's important to acknowledge the little things our loved ones do for us.

weheartit

So, hubster, thank you for:

* Buying me Skinny Cow ice cream and eating it with me while we watch "24" at a later hour since I didn't get home from work until 9:00.
* Making me a delicious, healthy, vegetarian meal each night AND cleaning up the kitchen because you know I had a long day.
* Getting rid of my old computer (she will be missed) and hooking me up with your Macbook. And being so patient as I adjust to the new intergalactic settings.
* Speaking of technology, thanks for always Photoshopping my nose in pictures. It makes a difference.
* Buying me flowers - just because.
* Buying me cupcakes - just because. Can you tell I am motivated by food?
* Letting me watch "Glee" and "Tori and Dean" even though you can't stand them.
* Getting up at 6:30 am on a Saturday with me to help me clean.
* Standing in the cold and wind for two hours, cheering me on in the half-marathon.
* Going on coffee dates with me each morning and helping me process the day ahead so I don't become overwhelmed.

I could go on and on and get all sappy and wish for rainbows and sparkles, but I'll leave it at that. Thanks for indulging me:) It's just so comforting that when life gets crazy, my hubby is right there to pick up the pieces and make me feel better.

Who are you grateful for these days? What little gestures do you appreciate?